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Tuesday, 30 May 2017

HE USED THIS NO 12 PICKUP LINES AND I NEARLY ASK FOR HIS HOUSE ADDRESS

Funny Pick Up Lines

Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?
Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them.
I grew up during the sixties, with the peace and love generation. If I can’t get some love, I’d like to get a piece.
On my last date, we played strip poker. We stripped, and I poked her.
I just got out of Leavenworth. Can I steal you a drink? How about a BMW?
Are you a campfire? Cause you’re hot and I want s’more
We’re not socks. But I think we’d make a great pair.
Girl, you Make Curves Great Again.
Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?
Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
Are you an architect? Because you just erected a monument in my pants.
Good news, the test results are negative!
Hey! tell your nipples to stop staring at my eyes.
Are your feet tired? ‘cuz youve been running through my mind all day.
Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?
You wanna see a donkey show?
Do you have a quarter? My mom told me to call her when I found the woman of my dreams?
Excuse me, I am a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home together?
Hey, somebody farted. Let’s get out of here.
Those are nice legs. do they come over easy?
I have 4 words for you “Hol I Day Inn”.
If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
Did you sleep in a garbage can last night? Because you are looking trashy!
I think there’s something wrong with my eyes…I can’t take them off of you.
My magic watch says that you don’t have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast.
Do you have the time? (she/he gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down.
You look alot like my next girlfriend/boyfriend
Can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I’d call when I found someone better.
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) ‘Cause I could see myself in your pants.
  • Boy or girl: Do you work for Nike?
  • Boy or girl: Why ?
  • Boy or girl: Cause every time I see you i wanna “Just Do It”
My name might not be Taco Bell, but I sure can spice up your night!
  • Q: “What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?”
    A: “I want you inside me!”
Jingle bells, Facebook smells, Google+ go away. Myspace yuck, Bing sucks, Twitter ALL the way!
When a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Will you be my penguin?
I hear you’re good at algebra…..Will you replace my eX without asking Y?
Are you a tamale? ‘Cause you’re hot.
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d have five cents.
As she’s leaving…. Hey aren’t you forgetting something? Her: What? … Me!
Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call fine print.
Can I get your picture to prove to all my friends that angels really do exist?
“I Love You” takes 3 seconds to say, hours to explain but a lifetime to prove.
Your legs are like an Oreo cookie, I want to spread them and eat the good stuff in the middle.
Hi, I would like to introduce my Crouching Tiger to your Hidden Dragon.
If I was a plant you’d make my roots extend.
Do you have a library card? Because I’m checking you out.
I’ll give you five seconds to give me your number or you can forget about going out with me forever.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You’ve got fine written all over you.
I hope your a plumber, cause you got my pipe leaking.
I call my thing Notorious, cause its B.I.G.You remind me of a magnet, cause you sure are attractive.
Did you sit in Frosted Flakes??? Because that a$$ is amazing!
Are you a bunny? Because you hopped your way into my heart.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it’s just a sparkle.
I like Legos, you like Legos, why don’t we build a relationship?
Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.
  • Me: Wanna go out?
    Girl: I have a boyfriend.
    Me: It’s just like soccer, a goalie doesn’t mean you cant score.
    Girl: My boyfriend is Tim Howard
I’m not a photographer,  but I can picture us together.
Beww BEWWW Beww (What?) That is the sound of the ambulance coming to pick me up because when I saw you my heart stopped!
Bae, if you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple.
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into the wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
Are you a campfire? Cause you’re hot and I want s’more
You smell like trash.. Can I take you out
  • Boy: “Do you want a kiss?”
    Girl: “No!”
    Boy: “Do you remember what I just said?”
    Girl: “Do you want a kiss?”
    Boy: “Yes, if you insist..”
Is your name Ariel? Because I think we mermaid for each other!
  • Boy: Close your eyes.
    Girl: K
    Boy: What do you see?
    Girl: Nothin.
    Boy: That’s my life without you.
We’re like hot chocolate and marshmallows; You’re hot and I wanna be on top of you
You’re the only girl I love now… but in ten years, I’ll love another girl. She’ll call you ‘Mommy.’
Can I take your picture to prove to all my friends that angels do exist?
I tried my best to not feel anything for you. Guess what? I failed.
Your body is 65% water and I’m thirsty.
Hey, don’t frown. You never know who could be falling in love with your smile.
My doctor says I’m lacking Vitamin U.
Have you been to the doctor lately? Cause I think you’re lacking some Vitamin Me.
Forget about Spiderman, Superman, and Batman. I’ll be your man.
Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.
Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.
For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me.
You look so familiar… didn’t we take a class together? I could’ve sworn we had chemistry.
Fascinating. I’ve been looking at your eyes all night long, ’cause I’ve never seen such dark eyes with so much light in them.
Was your dad a boxer? Cause you’re a knockout!
You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
Did it hurt? when you fell from heaven.
You shouldn’t wear makeup. It’s messing with perfection!

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